I know I promised to write up a post about seeing Joe Biden but several things got in the way. First, I wrote up a very personal and emotional post about something I've been struggling with for the past six years but in particular in the last few months. Then, of course, I couldn't bring myself to post it. Ironically, the post was about how I have a hard time opening up and sharing my feelins. It shouldn't be surprising that I didn't post that entry. Then, I felt like too much time had elapsed since my Joe Biden experience. Also, I am somewhat embarrassed, however, I will admit that it was quite hilarious.
So now I'm back here, better late than never, to tell my tale of mystery and intrigue. Ok, there was no mystery or intrigue. There was plenty of comedy, however. It is experiences such as the one I am about to recound that makes me think that someone should just follow me around with a video camera to record all the ridiculous shit that happens in my life, most of which ends in my own humiliation. My roommate now asks me every day after classes, not how my day went but what embarrassing situation I got myself into that day because I always have a story to tell that involves my public humiliation. It's a good thing I can laugh at myself.
Anyway, moving on to Joe Biden.
There are a few facts that need to be explained before I begin my tale. First, I am a college student. This means that I have a shitty sleep schedule. For example, last night I stayed up until 3:30 AM and woke up at 9:30 AM. I considered that I good night of sleep. Last Tuesday night I believe I did not go to sleep until about 3:00 AM but unlike today I had to wake up at 7:00 AM to go see Joe Biden. Normally I do not worry about only getting four hours of sleep. What is black coffee for if not a substitute for a normal sleep schedule.
Here's an interesting fact about black coffee that I have learned: Coffee helps keep one awake; it is my drug of choice to make up for my shitty sleep schedule, however, it only works on one important condition--that said coffee is consumed continually, multiple cups over several hours. Then, of course, you must set aside a few hours for an unhealthy crash but that is not to be worried about. College students always find time for impromptu naps.
Back to The Morning of Joe Biden. The second fact that should be explained: I did not have sufficient black coffee in my system that morning. I got a good start, a fairly strong cup consumed while walking to the Student Center. Then, I had to stand in line to get in. My coffee ran out. I could not leave the line. I had no means to fill my coffee cup. This is when I began to panic. They gave me free fruit snacks, though, so this assuaged my fears for a while.
Then, they separated students from non-students. I met up with the girl I met buying the tickets (which were actually free for students but we had to stand in a line). She looked much better off than I did, smily and bubbly and all the things I should have been because anyone who knows me knows that I am nothing if not a politics nerd. We were walking into the auditorium when we were approached by a man in an expensive suit.
"Would you ladies like to sit on stage this morning?" he asked. I glanced at my friend. Here is what was going through my head: I NEED COFFEE I NEED COFFEE I NEED COFFEE Stage? COFFEE Would that mean I would be mere feet from Joe Biden? COFFEE COFFEE Wait. Stage? COFFEE This event will most likely be televised. COFFEE COFFEE COFFEE Did I put on makeup? Yes, but I NEED COFFEE Do not want to be on stage. COFFEE Could sit off to side, still be near Joe Biden and not ever on TV. COFFEE COFFEE I NEED COFFEE RIGHT NOW
"Ok, sure," my friend answered unaware that my mind had just undergone such a debate. And so we were led off to the stage where similarly shocked prisoners were already seated. There were only two open seats. Here is how the stage was set up: a podium on one side, three stools in the middle, and a table set up with microphones on the other side. I was under the impression that this would be like a Town Hall Meeting I assumed that Joe Biden and the Secretaries of Education and Treasury would be seated at the table. I thought if I took the seat behind the table I would surely be on television. And so I chose the seat behind the podium, slightly rised because it was the second row of stage seating.
I did not know that there would be long speeches given from the podium. I thought the podium would be used to introduce the event and the speakers, who would then stay seated answering questions from the stools or the table. Oh, how I was wrong.
Not only did all three speakers give long speeches from the podium but because of the camera angle zoomed in somewhat, I was the only person on stage to be on television for the majority of said speeches. Thank God, I had put some small amount of effort into my appearance that morning. I had put on a cute but conservative sweater, a high wasted skirt, and my favorite boots. I had even put on eyeshadow, demure and neutral but enough to actually enhance my sleepy eyes. My roommate later told me that I looked like Audrey Hepburn (well she said, "that girl in the picture over your desk" because she didn't know who Audrey was, which is a travesty but I forgave her because, even though she didn't know it, saying that I resembled Audrey in any way is enough to make me love you forever).
Of course, I must elaborate. I looked like a very sleepy Audrey Hepburn.
Halfway through the Vice President Biden's speech, the first of three, my eyes started to feel heavy. I didn't worry too much, I was actually interested in listening to the Vice President's speech. I could make it through, I thought. Mind over matter.
Well, here's the thing about trying to stay awake on four hours of sleep and only one cup of coffee, it's hard and you need extreme distraction. As interested as I was in the Vice President's, Secretary Geiner's, and Secretary Duncan's speeches, staring at the back of their heads was not particularly interesting. The situations escalated quickly. Sitting on the stage meant that bright lights blinded me if I looked anywhere but at the back of the speaker's head. I became so exhausted my mind couldn't even process the words. The room began to spin. I tried to count everyone in the room, I tried singing to myself.
I did not actually fall asleep but my head dipped down at one point. After the speeches, the Biden, Geitner, Duncan and the other panelists took questions from the audience. This was much more interesting and dynamic. I woke right up. It was as if I had been in a trance for the speeches.
Afterwards, my roommate calls me dying of laughter. She had been eating lunch, looking up at the TV, and started laughing at this idiot girl falling asleep on screen. Then she thought to herself, "That girl kind of looks like Rosalee...Wait. That IS Rosalee!"
She, of course, told everyone she was with. By the time I returned to my floor that night, every one of our friends knew the story and started laughing when the saw me. Luckily, I realize how ridiculous this situation was. I'm laughing at myself just thinking about it.
I fell asleep on TV while listening to Joe Biden's speech and am now known as That Girl Who Fell Asleep.
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